Top Ten Best Museums (and Ham Restaurants) in the World

Ok, here is a list of the best museums (and Ham restaurants) in the world.

1. Prado - great.

2. Seattle Art Museum - sucks, shouldn't be on the list.

3. Tacoma Art Museum - a beauty. Just saw an exhibit by the guy to the right there, Akio Takamora. His stuff is a little repetitive, kind of ho-hum, once you've seen one, you've see them all, it's almost if he doesn't have any rhyme or reason to his work and I say this with absolutely positive objectivity. This drawing I call "portrait of a self-portrait."

4. Doll Museum in Bellevue - one of a kind for a reason. Never been there. Chris has, many times and it's just one of many reasons we all wonder a little about him.

5. Museum of Ham - not really a museum, it's a restaurant in Madrid. It's a chain of Museums of Ham. You can't get ham like this at most museums, lemmetellya. All kinds, your black forest ham, etc. of course the menu is all written in Spanish, like Julie and I are supposed to understand THAT!

6. Louvre - this is the one in Pocatella, Idaho not Paris, France. No, Ha Ha, kidding about that, it's the one in Paris France. I went there once, stood in line in front of the IM Pei addition, the pyramid in the center of it, and listened as people ragged on it. I liked the pyramid but didn't like the museum, I raced (I was fast back then and easily outpaced tourists) to see the Mona Lisa before they could see it (Ha! I won!) and saw some Michelangelo something or other. But I felt at the time that the other paintings left a lot to be desired, I mean how many HUMUNGOUS paintings of horses can you look at? I mean one HUMOUNGOUS horse is one thing, but a whole bunch of them? You got to be a big horse lover, maybe a big horse lover will love it there, I don't know.

Since then, however, I've come to have an appreciation of some painters who more than likely have some stuff hanging there such as Titian, for instance. And probably some others too, so I think I should go back and check it out, avoid the horses altogether except of course when they're in a Titian painting ("Portrait of a Horse").

7. Outboard Motor Museum, south of Tacoma - never been there, but Chris has. I think they wanted him to be the resident artist there, but he declined.

8. Chicago art institute - CRAMMED with art, lots of impressionists (who are in my dog house lately, just how many paintings did they paint, the rascals?). And how cold do you think it can get officially and still support human life? I'd say about 20 freaking below, about the temp that it was when we visited. Luckily, I have eggs-perience at the cold stuff, or Julie and I would have been frozen stiff in the middle of a big field that Julie wanted to cross and to which I said No Way, do you want to be frozen stiff? Midwesterners know to avoid a field during a cold snap. And why there's a field in downtown Chicago is a question that we asked ourselves. In the warmth of a nice bar.

9. New York Museum of Modern Art and Metropolitan Museum - Yawn, take me someplace great, will ya? Ha Ha, another joke. These two museums probably should be rated higher than the Outboard Motor museum, but only because the book store at the Outboard Museum didn't carry any copies of "Outboard Motors: Do you love them or do you not, finding them stinky and noisy?"

10. Unofficial Norman Rockwell Museum somewhere in Vermont where I was at Tamily's wedding - this is not the "official" Norman Rockwell museum even though it's run by one of the people who actually was in a Norman Rockwell painting way back when. It's got a lot of Norman Rockwell stuff, which I guess shouldn't be a surprise.

I don't pretend this is a definitive list of the top ten best museums in the world, but I would be willing to argue my point on any one of them with gusto. And believe me, you haven't seen gusto like I got gusto when it comes to the best museums in the world. (I might not have quite the gusto on the ones I haven't been to (but are on the list).)

I just have to say that I know two of the best going to museum people in the world too, Julie and Chris. They really are the best and all their bestness comes out the most in museums (except that Julie's back gets a little sore if she's on her feet in a museum all day.)

Best going to Museum People

(Tie) 1. Julie and Chris.